scripture reading: Numbers 22:22–35
Pardon My Blooper!
A cheerful heart is good medicine, but a crushed spirit dries up the bones. (Proverbs 17:22)
Laugh! It’s good for you. Not only that, it’s biblical! Wholesome humor is good for the soul. Whatever burden you may be carrying, whatever ache may be gnawing at you, perhaps the Great Physician would give you a prescription this morning, urging you to simply sit back and enjoy a good, hearty laugh. Church bulletins and newsletters are not typically intended to be humorous, but when the editing process fails to detect an error, the results can be hilarious. These bloopers are classics and guaranteed to make you laugh. So sit down and take your medicine; you’ll feel better right away.
,. For those who have children and don’t know it, there is a nursery downstairs.
,. Because of our pastor’s absence this Sunday we will enjoy the rare privilege of hearing a good sermon as Rev. J. F. Stubbs fills our pulpit.
,. When parking on the north side of the church, please remember to park on an angel.
,. Ladies, don’t forget the rummage sale. It is a great chance to get rid of those things not worth keeping around the house. Don’t forget your husbands.
,. The Low Self-Esteem Support Group will meet this Thursday at 7:00 PM. Please use the back door.
,. Tonight our visiting missionary, Bertha Belch, will share her story. Come at 7:00 and hear Bertha Belch all the way from Africa.
,. Please remember in prayer the many who are sick of our church.
,. Please welcome Pastor Don, a minister who loves hurting people.
,. It’s Drug Awareness Week. Get involved in drugs before your children do.
,. Weight Watchers will meet at 7:00 PM at the Presbyterian Church. Please use the large double doors at the side entrance.
,. Pray for the Jones family as Robert has finally gone on to be the Lord.
,. Potluck Supper Sunday at 6:00 PM. Prayer and medication to follow.
,. The third verse of Blessed Assurance will be sung without musical accomplishment.
,. This being Easter Sunday, Mrs. Lewis will come forward and lay an egg on the altar.
,. Illiterate? Write to the church office for help.
,. The proceeds from our annual auction will be used to cripple children.
,. The class on prophecy has been cancelled due to unforeseen circumstances.
,. The choir will disband for the summer with a hearty thank-you from the entire church.
,. The Outreach Committee will be visiting people who are not afflicted with any church.
,. The ladies of our church have cast off articles of clothing of every kind. They can be seen in the church basement this Saturday.
,. The choir’s annual cantata will be hell this afternoon.
,. The congregation should remain seated until the end of the recession.
,. If you enjoy sinning, join our choir.
,. Morning sermon: “Jesus Walks on Water.” Evening sermon: “Searching for Jesus.”
,. Barbara remains in the hospital in need of more blood transfusions. She is also having trouble sleeping and requests tapes of Pastor Jack’s sermons.
,. During the second song, ushers will eat those arriving late.
,. Don’t let worry kill you—let the church help.
,. Our final hymn: “Wise Up, O Men of God.”
God likes a little humor, as is evidenced by the fact that he made the monkeys,
the parrot—and some of you people.—Billy Sunday
point to ponder • Does God have a sense of humor?
prayer focus • For the ability to help lighten someone’s load so that he/she can be freed to laugh.